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Today, 06:54 PM

? #1 (permalink)

Member

Join Date: Jul 2011

Posts: 365

Seriously?

AX emailed me again today, complaining about how horrible his job is and that he wishes he could start his own business and work for himself, if only he had the capital! And, he has lots more to tell me and just loaded his cell phone up with minutes so I can feel free to talk to him at any time.

He has got to be kidding me. I mean, it's true, there is nothing I would love more than an unemployed, abusive alcoholic living for free in my house and borrowing "capital" from me so he can realize his dream of owning his own business. As a single mom who just had to go on food stamps so I can feed my kids while I look for a better job, I know that I have to put me and my children's selfish needs aside in order to help this lost soul on his path to fulfillment.

HA HA HA HA HA!

How can he seriously, seriously be fishing like this? It galls me.

Yes, I know, no contact. It's just so surreal.

Today, 06:58 PM

? #2 (permalink)

Member

Join Date: Jun 2011

Location: NY

Posts: 51

Wow. Just wow. Your x has no sense of reality.

Today, 07:03 PM

? #3 (permalink)

To thine own self be true.

Join Date: May 2009

Location: U.S.A.

Posts: 5,253

Why do so many As & As always talk about owning their own businesses?!?!

You know, I probably would have fallen for that "capital" plea. I think about all the things I have done for people "out of the goodness of my own heart," without even being asked. Good lord.

Yeah, isn't it pitiful that your AX wants your help while you are struggling yourself? Don't they SEE how much they take from children? I've read so many posts lately about As & As mooching off their 70+ year old parents. It makes me sick these people who just take and take, and especially from struggling moms, children, and elderly folks.

__________________
God, grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change,
the courage to change the things I can,
and the wisdom to know the difference.

Peace out.

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Today, 07:11 PM

? #5 (permalink)

To thine own self be true.

Join Date: May 2009

Location: U.S.A.

Posts: 5,253

AXBF lived in my house for 2.5 years, rent free, everything paid by me, and the whole 2.5 years he talked about starting his own business. (Most of the talk did die down after about the first 1.5 years). But the entire time he just spun his wheels at a thousand miles an hour, going here and there, doing all these things that got him nowhere. Then he moved out of here saying he was "Moving forward with his life," as if lying to and cheating on me and moving to a rented room is a major life accomplishment. And just the other day, because I have been asking him about the many thousands of dollars he owes me, sends me a text asking if he can use a picture of my house for his business advertisement. Another snow job, I am sure. Yeah right, you couldn't get the business off the ground when you were here and now all of a sudden this is happening. Fat chance.

Nothing he ever said we were going to do together ever came to fruition. I couldn't even get him to get a passport so we could travel.

Ugh. Sorry, didn't mean to hijack. Your post just reminded me of all this stuff. Thanks for your post.

__________________
God, grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change,
the courage to change the things I can,
and the wisdom to know the difference.

Peace out.

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Today, 07:12 PM

? #6 (permalink)

Member

Join Date: Jul 2011

Posts: 365

Yep. I try to imagine how successful a mentally ill, angry alcoholic who can't even take care of himself would be at running his own business. Of course he wants to run his own business because he is probably about to be canned at his current job. And he got fired from his job last year for not showing up because he was too drunk. And he had to leave the job before that because he went under house arrest for DUIs. And he got fired from the job before that!

He said in the email today that his boss is "confrontational". It's his favorite way to describe people: me, his family, his other exes, other bosses. Everyone is confrontational. The fact that it doesn't dawn on him that other people are not in constant conflict with everyone in their lives shows how out of touch with reality he is.

Last year, it's entirely possible I would have fallen for this. After all, last year I loaned him several thousand dollars to get his license back, pay his probation fees because there was a warrant out on him, and get his car fixed and back on the road. And I sit here now and wonder what I was thinking at the time. I guess it's a sign of real improvement that I wouldn't lift a finger to help him now.

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Today, 07:37 PM

? #7 (permalink)

Member

Join Date: Sep 2011

Location: Texas

Posts: 91

Excuse me for saying this because I don't mean to be ugly BUT....owning their own business is just another excuse to have freedom to drink! Are we stupid ....not! I went thru the same thing. Their was a time years ago XABF had a successful business and still could if he'd put down the bottle. But he didn't and won't .....so drinks! No on my time anymore!!! Sorry, i know i am rude about this at times. I am still in the angry stage and seems to be the only way to get thru the pain at the moment. This too shall pass.. but I did love this man with all my heart!